#39 £8

Due to industrial strike action, this week's entry has been put together in five minutes.

The Apprentice:
Blimey! How difficult do the two teams want to make it for themselves? You are never going to find a dinner jacket in Camden Market! You won't get cooked lobsters from a fish stall in the East End! Don't spend two hours, forty-five minutes drawing plans on flip-charts! Most of all - don't then pretend that it isn't all your fault at the board meeting to look good in front of Sir Alan!! "I don't know if you're just a bloody nutter" has to be one of the greatest quotes from the series.

Sheffield United vs Crewe:
The trick here is to buy student tickets, forget your NUS card when you get to the turnstiles, and then blag your way into the Kop amongst all the hardcore fans who know every song. Or at least, that's what I've been told by the jammy Midlanders who did this. Also, why did no one else in the Gordon Lamb Upper Stand chant "You're not singing anymore!" when the half-time entertainment ended?

Strike Action:
Strike action on Tuesday meant a day off for me, and a day waving placards for my lecturers and seminarers. Give them more money! No seriously, do, else we won't get all our essays marked and our end-of-year exams look in jeopardy. Actually...

Facebook:
The whole Facebook debate continues. Will the losers who I've never actually spoken to please stop trying to be my friend. Do you even understand how Facebook works? Do you realise that the people with "347 friends" don't actually know 340 of them? They just think that they should add them because they happen to live in the same campus/city for 6 months a year. Get some real friends, and you'll recognise what a waste of time Facebook is.

Yes, I'm talking to you, Ed Callow. You sad, lonely retard.

The Away-Goals Rule is stupid.

Emily Maitlis never really pulls off the "friendly" interview quite well enough.

Renaissance English Literature is also stupid. And dull. Stupid and dull.

Snow:
Going out of an evening, even though it's snowing: the mark that I'm slowly becoming Northernised. Luckily, it was the same night as the Sheffield game, so it was out with The Yellow Ball.

Thunderbird is brilliant.